Very Demure: The New Social Media Trend Explained
Very Cutesy. Very Mindful. Very Demure.
Image credit: Instagram @hellokitty
‘‘You see how I do my makeup for work, very demure, very mindful,’’ says TikToker Jools Lebron in a viral video with over 3.8 million likes. Demure is the new TikTok catchphrase that has been sweeping across our social media feeds, with over 300,000 posts on TikTok and celebrities including Jenna Ortega, RuPaul and Lily Collins participating in the trend. But why is the phrase suddenly so popular, and what exactly does it mean?
Demure can be defined as being ‘’shy, modest and reserved,’’ typically being used to describe women. A constellation of other related words are often used in viral ‘’demure’’ videos, including ‘’mindful’’ ‘’cutesy’’ and ‘’respectful.’’ The trend can be seen as a backlash to ‘’Brat girl summer’’ which, inspired by Charli XCX’s techno pop album, encouraged wild nights out, messy behaviour and being unapologetically yourself. Some TikToker’s have even joked about transitioning from ‘’Brat Summer’’ to ‘’Demure Fall.’’
At the essence of the demure trend is an embrace of modesty, quiet confidence and understated elegance, and it can be seen as an offshoot of previous viral trends such as ‘’quiet luxury’’ which also focused on subtlety over extravagance. The demure trend also encourages living a peaceful life rather than engaging in drama. In one video, TikToker Tam Kaur provides advice on how to be demure, with tips such as ‘’Step number one to being a demure girly is that we do not believe in clapbacks [...] It’s very cutesy to withdraw yourself, know when to cut other people off and refrain continuously giving them your time and energy when they clearly do not deserve it.’’
Many creators have also made videos with an ironic take on the demure trend, such as Julie Theis’ video on having a ‘’Demure Menty B’’ or Hannah Wood describing cutting a demure piece of chocolate cake. Demure can also be seen as a continuation of other ‘’girly’’ trends such as ‘’girl dinner’’ and ‘’girl maths,’’ which offer a fun and sometimes satirical take on embracing and reclaiming girlhood and femininity. It should also be noted that demure is a trend that was started by and for transwomen. Jools Lebron, who sparked the trend, is a transwoman who will be able to pay for the rest of her transition using the revenue generated from her viral video. ‘’There’s a tongue-in-cheek levity to Lebron telling her viewers how to be demure… It’s no surprise that such innovation, irony, and subtext could only come from the likes of a transfemme influencer,’’ says Quispe López in Them.
What are your thoughts on the demure trend? Let us know in the comments below.
Image credit: Instagram @roseberrylemonade
References:
Cooperman, J. (2024) Demure, mindful, cutesy, Common Reader. Available at: https://commonreader.wustl.edu/demure-mindful-cutesy/ (Accessed: 21 August 2024).
Demure definition & meaning (no date) Dictionary.com. Available at: https://www.dictionary.com/browse/demure (Accessed: 21 August 2024).
López, Q. (2024) ‘A way of life for the dolls like me’: The Demure Tiktok Trend is by and for trans people, Them. Available at: https://www.them.us/story/what-is-demure-jools-lebron-tik-tok-trend (Accessed: 21 August 2024).
The Styles Desk (2024) Just how demure are you?, The New York Times. Available at: https://www.nytimes.com/2024/08/14/style/demure-tiktok-mindful-cutesy.html (Accessed: 21 August 2024).
